The Costco pick-up line

The Costco effect
It starts with buzzing
Florescent lights overhead
I steady
Face flushing - ready to dart
bracing myself on my cart
before falling to my knees
I say to myself,
Okay -
I’m ready
Stumbling to leave,
Crumbling
needing to eat,
in line a fisherman’s hat
behind me
starts to chat
I retreat
(The overgrown Teddy)
says kindly,
I’ll buy your dog
and your coke
Sweaty...
I freeze
Please don’t!
I’m older than you, he retorts
Like I haven’t heard that one before
No score
Old Fella!
No pass
Old man!
No class
Kiss my___!
Perhaps. . .and then again
I would have accepted
if he offered the chicken bake
instead of a dog and a coke?
You take the cake
Really!
How silly
What a joke
So, beware ladies
if an overgrown Teddy in a fisherman’s hat
tries to chat
It’s a pick-up line
in the pick-up line
at Costco.
Gotta go!

LDN